Leadership: A personal struggle

Have you ever struggled with leadership?  Oh, I have.   As I walked through the life of Saul and his kingly reign I was reminded of it.  Gosh, it’s been about twenty years but I remember the day my ego was severely bruised like it was yesterday.  🤕 The day my manager sat me down and said I would not make it too much further if I didn’t change. 

​As he continued to coach, I could feel the anger rising up in me.  As I fought back the tears, I remember, at one point, looking at him and thinking “Change? I am one of your top performers!” 

I went home crying that day, pissed, muttering under my breath that this guy had no idea what he was talking about amongst other things 😱 

But this guy saw something in me I couldn’t see and knew that I needed to stop managing and learn to lead or I would not succeed.

It turned out it was the best advice I ever received in my executive career.   In fact, in later years, once I got over myself, as part of the annual leadership meetings I began using my own personal story to illustrate my leadership journey.

See,  clearly there were facets of leadership I didn’t get.  I knew how to get a job done but the aftermath — not pretty.   

See, like Saul, I had leadership gaps and that is putting it nicely.  Like Saul, I didn’t get that leaders must promote teamwork and a winning culture.  Leaders must surround themselves with great leaders.  Leaders must possess emotional intelligence which is the ability to understand and manage their own emotions.  Oh, and those of the people around them, too.  So essential for success.

My personal struggle with leadership took me from a proud managing controller to a “most of the time” humble enabler, influencer and motivator.  My personal struggle taught me leadership takes continuous learning and growth.  Leadership is a journey.  

John F. Kennedy said “Leadership and learning are indispensable to each other.”  Oh, I could not agree more!

Be Strengthened and Encouraged in HIM!